Rotting memories

While searching for a book to read I stumbled upon some old journals somewhere at the back of the bookcase. Apparently, I was hiding them and completely forgot about them. Curious, I started to flip through the pages and realized they were from 7 or 8 years ago, a time when I was at my lowest point. I read some pages and it made me physically sick. My head began spinning, my vision blurred, and my chest was aching. I couldn’t think straight and I forgot where I was, what time, and what age.

I time-traveled to a time and space I barely got out alive from, and it turned my head upside down. Wanting to snap out of it, I took a long bath and repeatedly told myself that I’m safe and returned to my current reality. Things are different now, I’m more mature, more grounded. I have a peaceful life and so much more to live for.

The past is a scary place and I don’t want to go back there. Maybe I should get rid of those journals. What good to keeping them if they can still hurt me? The memories I have in my head from those times are slowly fading as I’m replacing them with new ones, better ones. But, somehow, the past always has a sneaky way of coming back and I’m scared I don’t have the strength to face it. Will I be strong enough to deal with it later? Only time will tell.


One Comment Add yours

  1. Amorina Rose says:

    You will be strong enough but its an ever day battle.

    Liked by 1 person

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